Suiciders are selfish
It was 25th March of 2019, my friend called me and said, “take care of his father. They are here. I am coming in a minute”
This all started a day before. His name I cannot let you know. He had committed suicide, hanged himself to death. He was my junior pursuing MBBS.
So I am now talking about 24th March 2019.
His father and brother were about to come the next morning. He made a last call to his brother at 3 p.m.
His roommate was sleeping. As hypothesized by the police, he went to the kitchen, tied a knot around his neck and hanged himself.
The mate when saw him hanging called the landlord, they called the police and police called the ambulance.
It was a bit late.
I got to know at 07:30 p.m., around an hour late when it had all happened.
We rushed to the hospital, his batchmates stopped us in the staircase to ICU.
Everyone cried. I did not know him well but I knew he was a hard worker. He had cracked the medical entrance test of India.
He stood up on his parent’s expectations.
Did he??
or did he not ??
His father is a heart patient, so he was not told on the day it all happened.
The next morning i.e. on 25th March 2019 his father was here in the hospital to meet him ( as they had planned earlier ) and kept calling him.
Father waited and waited.
My friend called me and said, “Take care of his father. They are here. I am coming in a minute”
Our medical college and hospital are at the same place.
I went to him. With all my patience and courage, told him to come with me.
He said, “ my son is not picking up the call, it’s switched off”
I broke down but couldn’t show a single emotion.
I lied to him very well.
I said,” sir, he might be studying come with me”.
I brought him to vice dean’s chamber.
I remained out, called my seniors for help.
I wanted to be away, away from the person who was going to be aware about his son’s death in a few minutes.
His family members came, and in their presence, his father was told the truth.
I watched all this from the gate.
He stood for 2 minutes, unresponsive and then cried and cried……. and cried.
He yelled, he beat his chest, he cried, and then suddenly stopped.
Again unresponsive. His eyes fixed at an unknown, unrelatable point.
He committed suicide but ….. but his father will live with this thought that he couldn’t make his son a strong person. That he couldn’t give him much love. That he couldn’t give a sufficient care.
Suiciders are selfish. They are selfish because they want to be free from all the pain and misery and that too alone. They do not want to share the heavenly experience with anyone. I do not know whether these kind of people are brave or coward, I just know these people are way too selfish.
I just want one thing for them — if it is true that people are reborn and if in case these morons are reborn, then I want them to feel the same pain which their family members experience.
The pain of losing a near one, the pain of losing a family member, the pain of losing one’s own child, the pain which is unbearable, the pain of an irreversible situation, the pain which cannot be expressed, the pain which only the bearer feels.
Regardless of the reasons of suicide, suicide is never an option. But these suiciders won’t understand. They are selfish.
